the more i do my final year project the more i find that i am not cut out for animation. or maybe directing.. i can model my stuff fine. but directing a story is another difficulty altogether. and then there is design in everything... costume design of characters. character design, set design, lighting design, music design, sound effects design, camera work...
so much so much so much.... STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSLabels: melbourne, school, whine
Bean blubbered at [21:07]
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finished reading the book. started on the book last evening. finished it in abt a day of reading.. whoa.. hv nv been so caught up with a book as to finish it so quickly be4..
perhaps it's to do with the increasing pressure from school work being behind schedule..?
about the book, it tells the story of the writer himself from an interesting angle about confidence, love and inter-relations between ppl. some of the theories presented in the story are basically very true and makes perfect sense. it's been an intriguing read.Labels: feelings, love, melbourne, Stress, whine
Bean blubbered at [01:53]
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started reading a book last night.. an ebook to be precise. 8 chapters in alredi.. can't stop reading.. gonna be so behind schedule for my school work. hai.. oni in this course does ppl feel they r behind work.. it's oni been one week into the semester for god sake !!
first time reading a book off a screen. hate the glaring white bg.. thus i've copied n pasted all the text.. chapter by chapter onto an darkish bg html file to read off.. scrolling down a webpage as i read is easier than reading a pdf too..
here's something interesting to quote from the book...
"if you sit the average male down in front of anything halfway intriguing and explain to him that it has a system of rankings that he can get better at over time, he'll become obsessed. Hence the popularity of video games, martial arts, Dungeons and Dragons..."
Labels: feelings, melbourne, school, whine
Bean blubbered at [20:55]
feeling blue as my room is every evening.. just wanna rant out some thoughts.. u dun hv to read it if u dun want to.. it's pretty down.. shooo! go read some positive stuff instead..
life pans out in a way that we see changes. changes in environment. changes in ppl. or rather growth in ppl. Sometime i feel that this society has become cold and lifeless yet everyone is over-protective and skeptical abt anyone who dishes concern. is it realli gonna be a everyone-for-themselves world?
what is ur way out when u feel backed into a wall? do u fight bravely front on even though u feel bound for failure? or would u just give up crouching meekly in sorrow and isolation? when u r troubled, do u still see others who r in need of a confidence boost? or do u only care abt nothing but urself? is giving up on helping and encouraging when u urself is in dire straits selfish?
is there someone in ur life u feel u can share both sorrow and joy? when u feel u hv no one.. how does it feel? does noeing how bad it feels makes u more receptible to helping others get over pain? how would u feel if u hv been betrayed by accident?
was having this conversation with a fren.. somehow we tok abt horror movies? that they r not as scary as before.. ie. Alien3 being a lousy sequel to the previous 2 excellent movies. more n more
"horror" horror movies spawning.. much gore replacing for pure ghoul-eerieness... hostel and hostel 2 both portrayed humans as the root of all evil.. (in the 2 movies at least..)
what do u fear most? the hidden crazy monkey hiding in ur closet? the ghost under ur bed? or just a stranger?Labels: feelings, melbourne, Pain, Stress, whine
Bean blubbered at [15:06]
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Escape from modelling again.. boring to keep doing work.. So, i think up something random again.. was wondering the origin or my surname 宋 (song4). and google it up i did to quench my curiosity thirst.
Origin of Song*, Sung* | Famous People in History |
The 22nd most common last name in China. The Songs are the descendents of royal family in the Shang Dynasty. The brother of Shang Zhou was Wei Zi Qi, who repeatedly urged Shang Zhou to repent but failed. Seeing the duke of Zhou getting more powerful in the west, Wei Zi Qi was concerned and asked Shang Zhou to watch out. Shan Zhou replied arrogantly, "I am the emperor appointed by heaven. Why should I be afraid of the duke of Zhou?" Realizing that it was hopeless, Wei Zi Qi left. Indeed, Zhou overthrown against Shang and killed Shang Zhou. To gain support of the people of Shang, Zhou Cheng Wang made Wei Zi Qi the duke of Song in Shan Qiu (HeNan). The Song kingdom lasted for more than 700 years through Zhou, Chun Qiu, and Zhan Guo. In 286 B.C., Song was eliminated by Qi, and the people began to bear the last name Song ever since. Hometown: Li Shi in Shanxi Province. | Han Dynasty- Song Hong (prime minister) Tang Dynasty- Song Jin (general) Song Dynasty- Song Jiang (rebellion leader) The Song Sisters- Song Qing Ling married Sun Yi Xian, Song May Ling married Jiang JiaShi, leader of the Guo Ming Dang. |
analysis from here.Labels: feelings, melbourne, school, Stress, whine
Bean blubbered at [12:55]
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i dreamt... had multiple dreams in consecutive naps..
In sniplets here and there..
first dream.. my laptop malfunction. someone turn it directly off from the power switch. i was angry. he says something back. the laptop transforms into a robot when the power switch is turned back on. whoa..
second one.. ppl in the dream. mic. pat. no bed. sleeping on pillow on floor. anger. strangle. love. missing dor. cry. tears. sorrow.
third one.. you. mic. me. bus. i chided mic. my ears pulled by you. mic chuckled in seat behind. love. bliss.
*update: another dream after another 2-3 hr nap..
amazing 4th dream!!! mum was home. she was playing her video game when i asked her to gimme a hair cut. she agreed. she took out a lousy looking foldable scissors and proceeded.. less than 5 mins into cutting, michelle said something abt the game and she ran over to play her video game.
i set on the chair like an idiot waiting. then she came back after 5 mins. cut a bit and was interrupted again by a door bell or something.. n i was so pekcek in the dream that i decided to cut myself by facing a mirror.. even more pekcek when i felt i cut until look like shit.. hai.. n then i woke up..
damn... dreams make me feel funny. the better it is in the dream, the more 'awwww' and heartbreaking to recover from knowing it's but a dream. the more 'nightmarish' and terrible dream it is,... the more relieved it is to know it's all a dream.. phew..Labels: Dream, feelings, love, melbourne, Pain
Bean blubbered at [09:37]
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i hate airport tax... so ex so ex so ex..Labels: whine
Bean blubbered at [00:13]
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wh, rf, pam & i went to Lounge Upstairs for dinner tonite. Other than providing good ambience & an affordable dinner option for international students like me with a consistent menu of changing specials, this café/bar also offers an exhibition space with a new show opening each month.They were having this promotion of paying the time on Monday 6pm to 9pm.. so basically if you order at 6pm, u pay 6 bucks.. 7pm, 7 bucks and so on.. our meal turned out to be $6.20 each.. saving us about 8 to 9 bucks each. usual price is $14.90. The place had really nice ambience and was almost always crowded with ppl. We missed out two weeks ago as we hadn't made any reservations then but we weren't to be denied again tonite.. (i had made the table reservation the evening before.. kekeke)This is what each of us ordered(below).. yea, i noe ordering the same dish is kinda dumb.. but students like us tend to choose the filling yet yummy looking stuff.. which in this instance turns out to be the Chicken Parmagiana. It's basically a giant chunk of corn-crumbed chicken schnitzel lavished with napoli sauce and covered by a slice of ham with melted cheese on top. The complimentary hot fries and a refreshing salad complete the dish.
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyi_J3BbTHcYp_9IsgrJ4imnht8iQ4Wd6W1Q7rUwv5POwkHkQCzuiuFWh3zx-Q8mUkIQ0Ph24lS0fsK3n7-EqV5WjEdqifPXNJ2a0Av2TaZ8YKfnT0kBVA_ooLVIzeHSmlgzq_dw/s400/P1050058.jpg)
ok, i will go to bed now.. NO DROOLING all over my blog ahhhhh.... lol..
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2wzFEaBzUbHZ6yjZPTdvj0fy1sC87tQEGhqHSaZTS4C5sEMgck_SK5u-IR9qAqAhwjlX8sZq9BJ8eR-l0NDNEPpjJTFgEIHxvBd6aHssdFbAR_kXc0BhzTaoRhwmq5cprTYYV2w/s400/P1050059.jpg)
Labels: food, melbourne, places
Bean blubbered at [19:51]
Just couldn't resist taking another shot at the horizon of a setting sun.. it's so beautiful.. Labels: feelings, melbourne
Bean blubbered at [15:55]
So there I was minding my own business doing stupid facebook quizzes to wind away the time. I was getting totally distracted from what i should be doing (ie. modeling my 3D character) after another bout of emo...
Along comes uberly kaypoh miss J. Neo who suddenly feels she is 'close' enough as a fren to probe about my love life... duh...
J: u in singapore nw?
me: hi
me: nope
J: oic
J: so how have u been recently?
me: hai hao lor
me: v busy with school lor
J: i see
me: stress
J: attached mah? kekekekeke
me: errr???
she persisted.. despite my attempt to brush it off..
me: read frenster... it's complicated.
me: lol
J: sure or not
me: sure..
me: complicated..
J: can i ask u something but be frank with me
me: huh
me: abt wat
J: i heard that u n ***r**** together, am i rite? i cant remember frm who le n its very long time back
me: huh.. lovelife.. no comments..
J: then forget it lor....thats wat i heard sometime back
me: oooh (change topic pls.....)
J: n have not heard abt her for bery long time so thought if u two is togethr maybe u will know how is she recently
me: oooh (change topic pls..... pls pls... i beg u...)
...
(more denial of comments from me)
...
J: its ok that u dun wan to say
J: i wont force ppl
me: i nv say u force ppl mah
J: never mind anyway if u get to contact her or wat send my regards to her
J: thanks...ok i going to slp liao tmr need to go office early
J: bye...u take care (appears offline right after..)
Wow !! She said her piece and just left.. no chance to say bye even.. wonderful 'listening ear' skills.. from an ex-prudential agent..Labels: feelings, melbourne, whine
Bean blubbered at [01:42]
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sunday.. hai.. still no sign of you.. i guess i can see my importance to you. i cant help it if i still love u.. i miss n think of u everyday. i wanna go back to the time when we both enjoy toking to one another.. i wanna go back to the time when i call me n say u miss me.. that u wished i am right beside u right now..
i'd like to be an optimist but i dun see it happening.. ever..
surprise me, fate..
maybe i am deceiving myself.. coming up for u lotsa excuses/reasons.. just like cj suggested. i feel i noe u pretty well to say that deep down u love urself more than anyone.. and anyone who could be loved by you is definitely fortunate.
i really dunno.Labels: love, melbourne, Pain, Stress, whine
Bean blubbered at [14:37]
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the turmoil within begins again.. this time for a different reason. damn, i dunno why it happened.. but it has. so i guess internally it's chaotic again..
it's weird.. but some stubbornness in me still feels that the oni wrong i did was not swallowing the anger which arose from attitude which makes me pek cek.
when i am angry n pek cek, fueling the anger is the last u need to do to see me explode..
but in the end, i'm sorry. sincerely. but it's solely for the outburst.
i still do not and will not stop myself from being upset at those 'i-feel-is-sacarstic-but-u-deny-it-is' remarks..
when i do not feel a sorry is sincere, it's nothing.. i guess everyone feels this way..
when u do not feel sorry, do not see the wrong u did, NEVER try to apologize immediately.
the last thing u could do is apologize and then add in an extra line after ur apology that triggers the bomb..
...
...
...
exploding ain't happy.. =(
guilt, skepticism, regret engulfs...Labels: feelings, melbourne, whine
Bean blubbered at [01:13]
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![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEVU6DjdkBkVRDgfSV01NAdIFlWdAViHU6Krlj1WsEqR71hKRiFOjBSYeTXH3NxKvNxvaaFEaP-8VQpNOxPOFXvFcYYHrC4hzQPpL3-x3n4V6hWvI6GA4WGX2K8tlgCkpFfKZvQg/s400/P1050046.jpg)
Have always loved the night lighting of the Victoria State Library. So I finally waited with a camera till it turns dark for these gems.. Enjoy..Labels: melbourne
Bean blubbered at [00:26]
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I was making myself a humble dinner with a can of luncheon meat. Not just any simpleton this tuff lil nut. it's one can which requires all the outfield experience u can gather because this tuff nut has a primitive 'camping' style for opening a can(see pic i found online above).. Well, what could go wrong, right...? hmmmm... let's just say my kitchen table was looking murderous when my housemate walked right in from the front door in the midst of me cooking..
An injury(or rather a tiny slit on the thumb) just about exponentially increases the difficulty of making a sumptuous yet simple meal.. as if all the washing n cooking n boiling n stirring ain't enough hassle..i had to squeeze in time to invent this life saver(above) between flip-frying meat and stirring curry and spaghetti while trying hard not to drip blood all over the food. Also, extra caution has to be taken not to stain oil or impurities onto the wound. Man! i feel like i'm a girl with long beautiful nails trying to work her way around in the kitchen.. that is so 'BEN-PAR'-ish..
Trying not to apply pressure on the thumb during washing as this causes blood to unceasingly pour out.. imagine holding a pot without the use of ur thumb.. argh.. niggly bothersome pain to follow..Labels: melbourne, whine
Bean blubbered at [21:31]
i went on a mini Melbourne alleyway graffiti hunt down ytd.. here's my big fat catch.. they're actually all on my facebook but this is especially done for the few who have resisted the urge to jump onto the facebook band wagon..Labels: melbourne
Bean blubbered at [02:21]
A tall tower structure in Melbourne Central Shopping Mall.This panoramic pic was joined up 5 pics using photoshop..
Autumn leaves are so beautiful, rite? Autumn is also by far my favourite season..
How i wish Singapore have weather like Melbourne autumn.
Another autumn shot of a bunch of trees along Lygon St. This picture reminds me of the DVD cover of the movie, Big Fish.
My money winning Where's The Gold slots machine at Crown Casino.
Autumn leaves totally blew me away..
Panoramic view inside a room in the Victoria State Library.
Melbourne Public Bathhouse beside a RMIT building.
Horse waiting to take tourists for a ride along Swanston St...
Cute lil' florist beside the road along Swanston St..
loved the colors of the setting sun..![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8l8YmoeB6hYpvILuVUICQB2Hr5DWkAa0aaR0qfiQCz-bTmTk4-Hp4OAu6U6H5w5FOJ4iYM5oTpbekId5o1WXOA-XG3GV-AGlSmbjh9PwoXNR_n82pIiCSM4YcVtYKhAllWZZYzQ/s400/P1030731.jpg)
Grand Hyatt Hotel in MelbourneWhile winter is making everyone freeze,
I'll post some random photos reviving memories..
Be it good or bad,
Happy or sad..
I just wanna feel the breeze..
...
...
again...
Labels: feelings, melbourne
Bean blubbered at [01:32]
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