Me taking picture openly in a "musuem"
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Bean: Haa!! You're sentenced to jail!! you'll be locked here.. haha..... 10 years u'll stay...
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Demostration Bravo!! YongChai Demonstrating the CORRECT way to salute an officer.
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my buddy cupboard's new Face/Look!!
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Demostration Alpha!! YongChai Demonstrating the wrong way to salute an officer.
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Saturday. Went out with Jinny & Apple. CineLeisure 4th Floor K-Box. Sang from 1100h to 1400h. cost only 35 bucks for the 3 of us. so cheap. plus they throw in a meal too!! though not so filling but it was really worthed it for the ktv session. i vaguely remember that i paid 20+ bucks to sing with my soccermates each time i go. hmm...
it was the first outing we have as mere friends. took some photos. she seemed happier le. sang lotsa songs whose lyrics sorta match the situation i find myself in. for example, there was a song by daniel chan titled 'being happier than me'. that's what i really wishing her. i was the more vocal singer there but my voice probably sucks lor.. i was merely reading but really singing. haha.. but at least my voice could be heard. maybe it's coz i'm a guy la. voice rougher n easily heard.
waited up till around 4am for yongchai. coz had to collect the camera from him. i had lent him on friday night. dad was in a hurry to use it this sunday morning coz of his company event. hmmm.. played syphon filter. heh.. i'm lousy lah. but certainly enjoyed playing lor. wished jm was around lor. so he can play with me. he's much better in these games. jm, kelvo & terence are all away to taiwan. part of their ocs training lah. hmmm.. dav's going tomolo. & when they're back, i'll be going to brunei. haiz. i'll missed the guys.
ok, ciaoz.. i gotta go meet dav else i'll be running late. sianz. i'm always late.. actually this morning wanna meet him at the service one. but overslept la. blamed it on yongchai. haha.. no lah, i was a bit lazy lah.. ok, maybe blog one more at night. byee for now..
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anyone noticed the Switching of places?
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Timer taken... the 3 of us again.. Genie, Apple & Bean !!
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The buddies singing a duet together.. heh..
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The 3 up & coming singers at K-Box singing away from 1100h - 1400h !! haha...
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Buddies asleep in a rare afternoon nap this past week... Llewell & Juis..
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bean eating banana in bunk! haha..
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the platoon at the canon!! "Ready To Fire, One Guards!!" haha...
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Llewell, me n Timothy at the "canon/moltar" in front the nicely painted wall... hehe...
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bean at the "musuem" place called the reflections of bukit chandu. look at the grand mansion, pond n nice wall!! garden ain't visible here but it's realli nice...
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the platoon at the greeny forested area of kent ridge park.. great!! no sun!! haha.. i love shaded nature places..
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me beneath the canopy walk..
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another angle of the path of the canopy walk..
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Signal platoon at the step of canopy walk.. with sergeant Nick!! our tour guide of the day...
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taking a walk on canopy walk...
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Canopy Walk... heh.. me with prasad..
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there's a tank there..!! wow!!
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we finally reached the place.. !! Kent Ridge Park
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friday.. on the tonner to kent ridge park.. as usual the guys are dozing away...
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because of the new demanding BSO, we had to be ready to fall in from 8-5 everyday in sbo attire.. even our afternoon naps became a stressful n uncomfy one..
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picture of our signal store n us at work in sbo attire coz of our demanding bso!!
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a week of line maintenance after the 2 day one night exercise which caused a lot of line to become cha bee hoon... here we are reeling them back into nice nice Dispenser packs!!
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sian till dun wanna photo blog le... coz i venture into an album full of apple photos. sad n miss her. still want her but dun want her to suffer also. wishing this wishing that... haiz.. get on with ur life, bean... haiz.. stop thinking... y won't i listen to my brain?
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i'm thinking... not of happy thoughts that's all i'll say..
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me sian sian alone on sunday. on the day i broke up with her.
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Home Sweet Home to play PS2 with JM.
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My buddy YongChai giving the ride home on his dad's car from CMPB.
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Llewell and others from Pioneer platoon napping on the tonner.
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KhangHao & Alvin Napping on the tonner to CMPB to take part in the vertical marathon.
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the gay partners on the tonner touching each other's thighs..
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Beautiful Scenery as sky darkens during guard duty prowl..
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Llewell eyeing the 'titbit'... haha
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Prasad pretending to eat the supposed titbit from Platoon Sergeant's Thailand trip
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EePing reach checkpoint 3 to put the book in le... heh...
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EePing walking towards the checkpoint 3.
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me on guard duty posing near the helicopter..
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me during guard duty posing while eeping take my photo.. haha.. garang?
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bean with buddy yongchai posing n showing off the guards tab... ooops... he skinny lah.. make me look so fat.. arrggghhhh....
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bean sms-ing in bunk
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me posing in bunk alone with my khaki beret in smart 4.
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Went for a walk at amk centre to clear out my thoughts as well as buy some grocery to bring into camp. ended up spending 40 bucks on cds. i knew i'll spend. that's y i hesitated on going out for the walk.
After chatting via sms with david for a while & EePing on icq plus lotsa self thinking, i've managed to come to terms with the decision to leave my 3 year, 8 month and 28 day relationship behind. (25th August 2000 - 23th May 2004)hmmm... actually i impressed myself with how i mentally psyched myself into feeling happier and better.
i still do love you, dear. since you weren't happy with me, i dun think i should be selfish n burden you further. thank you so very much for all your 3 years of patience with me. though u din really enjoy it as much as i do i assume. i'm sorry for hurting u time n again. i'll continue to try to change myself. coz what u said is not for ur own good. it's for my own good. though i'm changing myself now, it's for myself. i love you. n i still do. but i dun wan a relationship where i'm the only happy party. if u're happy without me, i'll let you go. u're such a nice girl. simple girl.. never demand any material stuff. a veri filial daughter, a caring girlfren. an aspiring house wife who'll take good care of the kids. you are my first gf. u're really special to me. i will never forget you. hopefully i can continue to be ur fren.
monday is Exercise Genesis. 2 day 1 night. hello combat rations. good byee cook house. yurks.. gotta try to smuggle some biscuits in.
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Is it always like this? Does this happen to everyone who experience what i did? I wanna let my frens noe. but i'm unwilling to talk. i sms ppl. then tell them i dun wanna talk abt it with them. i dunno what i want. i'm such a Stupid fool!! idiot! frens i noe are all so unfortunate. all i do is burden them.
i see my one guards buddy. he has a good gf, maintained it well. he noes how to think. he has a bike licence. before he do things, he plan properly. not like me. i always garang gabo last minute only. he has a good family. a mother, a father, a younger brother n a younger sister. he can talk to them. he has a good relationship with his parents. i dun. i'm unfilial n so useless. me n my dad often quarrel. we juz dun see eye to eye. haiz. my buddy has his own bike. he noes the way around singapore. he feels confident abt himself. i don't. u'll feel secure with him. u won't with me. i'm juz an irritating nut. dun love me if u're a girl. u hv no future. dun befren if u're a guy, i only bring trouble to u. calling or sms-ing u to cheer myself up. i am useless. utterly useless..
after some unloading of my burden with my pals(see...? poor guys..), i realize that i won't want her back. not becos i dislike her or anything. she's a good girl who wants a simple life. however i can't provide her with her needs. i can't bring to her happiness. i only bring sadness, sorrow & worries to her. i should leave her. i not good enough for her simple needs. i'm a useless guy. i was being selfish trying to be with her. burdening her all the while. i wish someone would come thrash me up...
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Just did a quiz. Try it too, guys...
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ok, i'm back a true blue(khaki actually.. heh =P) guardsman. with guards tag n khaki beret. went thru the Guards Conversion Course through a period of 4 weeks. including live descend (heli-rappelling), gas chamber in mock 4, ATP(live range), coastal swim and of course the Guards Assault Course which included in itself a 50m swim in long four no boots. then quick march from Chong Pang Air Defence Force to Dieppe Barrack. then to bravo coy to do a rappelling down bird one. then off to the SOC ground. then casuavac for around a kilometre or more to the rugby field and leopard crawl across. (in the process inflicting a severely bruised n de-skinned elbow.) then after leopard crawl is again casuavac the victim to the end point which is about 300 metres.. then booked out friday night. woo hoo...
saturday. brunched at the prata shop. then to my house. looked thru albums after albums. memories invoked. regrets brought up. a bit sad but din allow myself to show it. i believe in "smile n the whole world smiles with ya, cry n u cry alone". i like the company a lot. thanks. =)
Haiz. i can get freaking blur. especially when my minds' blogged up (Ooops.. pardon the pun) by lotsa things to think and execute right after i awoke from a deep slumber. i actually accidentally deleted a folder i own with my name. "B-E-A-N". There goes my star folder. haiz. i cannot remember exactly what it contains even. only remember that it contains 2 word documents on photography. i had planned to read more but had left it there for long. i had painstakingly copy n paste them from a web site onto the word documents for around 2-3 hours that time i did it. Damn. i'm so mad but i sound so mellow. $%^&#@#$! F**king hell !!!
it's been dragging along.I actually wish she would do something to save it. i need her cooperation. i still feel that by working together for one another, we can still maintain it. haiz. i'm sad when i feel i can be happier with my other frens. the fact that i'm getting phobia of asking of this n that of her n scared that when i joke she doesn't take it like i want it. i'm getting a phobia of making her angry. which is no good. we want respect here not fear.
i missed u. i'm missing u. i love u. i need u. But.... Do you need me? ='( you're seemingly the only person on my mind who can make me cry now. it hurts me so much when u dun seem to care sometimes. i noe u said that i can never be sure whether u did do something to help things. but there ain't any results. can we have a nice talk n solve these indifferences one by one? i really missed the times. i've went thru the pictures we took together. the love seeds sowed. the stone which i incripted our names. i just wanna relive those memories. being happy together, being hopelessly in love, where everything in this cruel world would just fade away into obscurity and allow only one another to shine ever so brightly.. i'm fearing the worst. don't want. i dun want it to happen. please aid me and work together with me to prevent it. have belief dear... i'm sure we still can do it.
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Hi... no time to mesmerize this time for the blog of the week. saturday was wonderful. a very peaceful n sweet day at home. simplicity is beautiful. wan ton noodles for lunch. then overslept. so left for uncle john place late at around 2130h. kfc for dinner. cold but nice.
sunday was hot hot hot. soccer supposed to kick off at 0930h but no. ppl were late. ppl flew kite. ended up 9 against 11. lost 6-1. not bad considering the 2 man advantage we gave. Beach Road to sew velcro for guards tag. Guardsman i'll be this friday. with apple. to Bugis next. a necklace, & lotsa good food we ordered. enjoyable day for me.
rushing for book in. now packing bag n typing blog in double quick time. ok bye. enjoy urself. i'll be a back a Converted Guardsman with my guards tag n khaki beret!! ciaoz guys...
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Soccer was cancelled at the last minute. i had already finished brushing up n is ready to wear my boots to go out. kp called to say jm cannot make it coz he had a stiff neck. urghs. that's 2 weeks without any soccer action liao. it's like being dropped from a soccer team. heh.. luckily for us, it rained in the morning anyway.. fortunately for me, i din go n meet up with my fren at bishan also. my fren skipped classes n spent the morning snoring away at home.
So i stayed at uncle john's place till after lunch before i got him to send me home. reached home to find my pc cannot surf net again. argghhhh..... managed to solve the problem n kill a virus or two oni after a few hours. played ps2 with the guys who came over. jm, dn n kp.. kp had juz bought Ngage for $250. hmm.. second hand one which is oni a week old. not a bad deal indeed except for the sheer size n stupid way of talking. it's like reliving the days of the gigantic "dai gor dai" days.. haha.. u noe the sort where toy water bottles were used to model after? haha...
we had dinner together at casuarina road. prata shop again.. heh.. it was happy being with the guys. a get together where we talk cock n enjoyed one another's company. oh yeah, kp ask dn to try out driving his father's van for a change since he has got a license too. dn tried n immediately when coming outta the parking lot scratched the vehicle against another vehicle. whoops.. we sorta hit n run lor... haha..
ok, that's all for today. i got to dash. pack bag, change clothes n off i go... i'm missing some of my frens... dav, kelvo, aikie, etc... the poly school days.. haiz.. smile, bean. SMILE. okay,.... =) haha... :D
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Sleep depriving week it was! Whew it's it's all over! Damn it's gonna be repeated when Bravo Company goes for their ATP. Arrggghhhh... i'm a bobo. sianz. Monday to Thursday was my company's Live Range. Shooting with the SAR21 at Mandai Range. made up of stage A, stage B & stage C.
Stage A (Day Shoot): 2 magazines of 3 rounds each from 300 metres in fox-hole & proning positions with support, rundown in 40 seconds to 200 metre mark for 2 magazines of 3 rounds each in proning with support with first stationary then moving target, rundown to 100 metres mark in 40 seconds for 2 magazines of 3 rounds each in proning without support and kneeling/squatting positions of stationary n moving stations respectively then rundown to 50 metre mark for 1 magazine of 3 rounds in standing shoulder position then finally rundown to 15 metre mark for 1 magazine of 3 rounds in standing hip postion.
Stage B (Day Shoot): 2 magazines of 4 rounds each at 100 metre mark aiming at tactical target 1 and tactical target 2 in kneeling/squatting behind window and proning positions. then walk back to 200 metres for tactical target 3 and tactical 2 in proning position.
Stage C (Night Shoot): 2 magazines of 4 rounds each at 200 metre mark at illuminated and silhoulette target in proning with support position. rundown to 100 metre mark for 1 magazine of 4 rounds at blinking target in proning position, then rundown to 50 metre mark for 1 magazine of 4 rounds at blinking target in kneeling/squatting position. finally rundown to 30 metre mark for 1 magazine of 4 rounds at blinking target in standing shoulder position.
My score for my first test is 9/24(stage a), 8/12(stage b) & 14/20(stage c). total? 27/56. fail by one mark. i feel veri "bu fu qi" becoz there were several cases of discrepancies. if not for this n that i pass liao. (or am i a bad loser?) My score for my second test was 13/24(stage a), 3/12(stage b) & 10/20(stage c). total? 26/56. fail by two points. lotsa discrepencies again. very buay song but lan lan suck thumb. damn warrant officer dun grant IA reshoot coz he was on the phone then i waste in all about 10 over rounds. arrggghhhhh! but.. but.. at least i stole back one 5.56mm calibre tracer. haha..
Friday we did a bit of repelling. hip walk from the 4th storey of the building. clean fatigue. then rain disrupted our event so we'll have to wait for monday to do more! heh... then book out for long weekend. heh.. happy ah.. but poor yongchai n co. who're doing guard duty on saturday. heh.. fell asleep while waiting for a phonecall.. haha.. stupid me. regret lor. sianz. left the pc on the whole night oso. but refreshing sleep till 7am in the morning. must be coz of the fatigue from the 4 days of range. of which the last 2 days of range i oni slept 5 hours plus minus.
Saturday was as usual gf day for me. caught the beautiful boxer with apple. heh. quite a nice plot. changed my view of tresvestites a little. hmmm... the outing was sweet-sour. coz due to reasons unknown to me, our outings always seem to sour off towards the end around 5pm. hmmm... made me a little sad lor but i can endure. maybe it wasn't anyone's fault. juz let it pass by. now, i'm off to uncle place for dinner n soccer on TV. byee guys... maybe i'll blog a short one on sunday. heh... =)
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